Confessions of an "Eligible" Bachelor

As my caravan arrived at the critical juncture,
I prepare myself to face the moment of truth;
A moment that comes but once, in life,
to change it forever, by design or disaster.

All past anxieties now seems like a speck,
against a deluge of uncertainties I walk into;
The fleeting moments of grief n joy, of past,
I recall, appear too tiny to rely upon.

I pace between the gates of heart and mind,
to discern a way through the clogged drains
...of my other whole.
The cradle of heart sang many a gentle hymn,
until the legacy of the mind shredded it all into pieces.

The dilemma gets murkier at the doorstep of dawn,
or whether I'd recede into a deeper darkness;
The choice is mine, but not entirely mine,
whatever be the turn of the coin;
when I look back from the shores above,
I wish I could make one life worth living.